Thoughts on just being a guy

[sebbie]

Thong underwear and a sapphire blue Speedo® Part2

Read previous post first!

Sadly, most of the male thongs sold nowadays have bigger pouches and bands at least a half inch wide designed to cover the length of the butt crack (for modesty?). As swim thongs became popular on at least some beaches, the unwritten rule was that it was OK to show butt cheeks uncovered, but an uncovered butt crack is nudity—illegal on many beaches. Unfortunately, most men’s thong underwear nowadays follows the swim thong design with the half-inch wide back designed to fit over the butt crack but not within, and for sheer erotic pleasure the design is not nearly as much fun or arousing.

In my collection I still have a few of the old school thongs with the backs consisting of either a 3/16-inch diameter cord or an elastic band of the same width. I used to wear these thongs as my only undergarment under my snug-fitting jeans and kick back and simply enjoy my body as I walked.

Recently I got to thinking what would it feel like to use one of these thongs as an under liner to a traditional sapphire “Christopher Atkins” style Speedo®? So I find one of my old-school thongs and get myself into it, then immediately pull a classic blue Speedo® on over it. Everything in position. The thong puts my penis forward and upward inside the speedo, but my penis and balls are locked in one position, and I am oozing precum. I crawl into bed, feeling great, but quickly fall asleep.

About 3 AM I wake up and somehow I want to do some checking to see if I am still aroused. Yup! Except that, oddly enough, I feel even closer to an uncontrollable desire to have a full orgasm. This REALLY feels great! Just passing my fingers over the spot where my penis is feels wonderful, and with each pass I come closer and closer to entering the erotic phase with strong, repetitive muscular contractions.

Suddenly this same guy you know who claims that he is able to edge himself for as long as he likes is going into a full-scale orgasm. WOW WOW WOW has this been fun. What made the orgasm so much fun in part was all the edging stimulation from the thong that led up to this situation. I went to bed and fell asleep with a happy smile wearing the snuggest thong and a classic blue swim brief.

Some five hours later I awaken, still feeling really great down there and end this all with the muscular contractions of what turned out to be one of the best full orgasms that I have had in a decade.

Just being a guy is marvelous...do NOT pass up on the opportunities to enjoy being who you are!

Sebbie

[sebbie]

Warmer Weather is here!

After what to me was like an excruciatingly long period for cold temperatures, the thermometer got up to 85 degrees F yesterday, and I got to thinking about how much fun it would be to sleep overnight in a swim brief. The house had gotten to 73 degrees too, so it was more than time to switch over to my summer sleepwear which is only a snug-fitting swim brief. The really interesting part about this is that while a swim brief feels really snug and slick, invariably I just drift off to sleep. Then, like clockwork, I wake up at 3 AM feeling horny as all get out and also invariably my hands and fingers find their way down to the spots that are making me feel horny and I start enjoying myself some more. The only risk here is that I am liking this so much that I will soon end up in full-orgasm mode when I really just want to edge and then fall back asleep, still horny as all get out. It was all I could do to keep from going into an orgasm but somehow, I managed. My male body parts are really enjoying the warmer weather for sure.

If you are new to the idea of wearing only a swim brief as sleepwear, I strongly recommend this. I do not know if your experience will be similar to mine but you can easily find out. The brief need not bee cut too skimpy. For this activity I find a brief with 2 or even 3-inch sides works fine. The whole idea is for the brief to fit snug enough and be made of thick enough but still slick-feeling material to put a steady and firm pressure on everything in your groin area.

[Speedo right now has a “One” Brief that buyers are complaining fits on the small side and you should up-size one or maybe two sizes. But as sleepwear, ordering your normal waist size would probably provide the perfect fit. You want your sleepwear brief to fit tight and snug and give you the psychological feeling that something very important is in a slick but very confined space. but not to the point the tension is so extreme that you have difficulty falling asleep! Finding this exact place takes some research but the research is fun.]

So, this morning I get up, still feeling quite horny from my 3 AM edging session, and I want to continue those sweet sensations all day long! It's been a while since I have felt this good—somehow my sexual activity goes into hibernation in cold weather when the days are short. Invariably, my thoughts turn to going with a thong rather than tighty whitey briefs for the day. You know, a thong where the pouch pushes my penis up and forward even as the back cuts between and then cinches up between my glutes. The back provides a great sensation as whenever I bend forward it cinches up tighter even as my penis is pulling the pouch forward. This competition between the two competing forces is endlessly fascinating and the typical bodily response is to drip.

Of course, I am not going to wander around during the day wearing only an underwear thong. A strap and cup is called for—my favorite old-school jock strap like they wore in the 70s, with a cup just barely big enough to press down on and contain my flaccid penis, a penis that knows the cup is limiting the space for expansion. My little Duke strap and cup is perfect—Wal Mart used to sell these. So, the straps on the strap are crossing my glutes even as the thong back cuts between them, and the cup is “firmly” in position.

But that is not quite enough pressure in my effort to “climb the walls” so to speak. Besides, I am still nearly naked. The solution of course is to put a pair of my favorite Tesla running tights over everything, a new pair I have worn only a few times. I like these because if sized right, they fit like a second skin over my entire lower body, putting more pressure on the cup and adding to the fun. My SM ones are the perfect size for me, 5’10, and 150 lbs.

Still not enough cup pressure? Why not pull a pair of Starter brand knee-length compression shorts over the running tights? That is going to make the pressure on the cup and the stuff underneath even more extreme, and just thinking about this I keep getting hornier and hornier. My penis is now in a place where I could not directly play with myself even if I wanted to. But never mind that, I feel really great down there, and I am happily enjoying myself anyway. Very Happy!

Can I make it through my usual rowing and cycling workout this way? I will see! I will see!

Update 11:30 AM local time. I got through my usual rowing and biking workout...takes about 75 minutes. I really enjoyed myself, especially how the thong back cinched up between my glutes with every stroke of the rower. The constant pressure of the cup bearing down on my penis felt great too and stimulated me to row harder and harder. I'm still feeling way horny, and I am thinking about things to do the rest of the day. The day is young yet. This all started with the stimulation from my night sleeping in the swim brief. The sensations are overwhelming!

[sebbie]

Fun in a Swim Brief (and other stuff, too)

I keep wondering what percentage of guys get horny at the mere thought of getting into a classic swim brief such as a Speedo? Indeed, what percentage of guys like to crawl into a swim brief because it turns them on. Not that many years ago, The idea of a gay sexual relationship, male or female, was something that needed to be kept secret as it was seen by normal people as being abnormal. All that has changed, of course, and being gay is generally thought of as being just as normal as being in a straight (male-female) relationship. But there are a whole series of ideas that now challenge people. Not only the bisexuals, but the transgenders and the nonbinaries, all seeking the status that “ordinary” gay people have of being able to live their lives as normal human beings.

Given all of this, suppose that a guy can get himself aroused simply by crawling into a snug-fitting swim brief, and this same guy becomes very fond of doing so on a regular basis. Except, of course, enjoying one’s own body doing this solo is not accepted as appropriate or “normal” and, besides, no self-respecting guy would ever want to admit that he likes to crawl into a swim brief and get horny and hard. That’s “abnormal” as it is not sex involving another person and a guy who likes to do this needs to spend his entire life keeping this personal secret from anyone else, because the guy does not know how the someone else will react. This is a variation on the problem of the newlywed wife discovering (accidentally, of course) that her husband, despite having her for sex, still likes to masturbate alone in the privacy of the bathroom. And I read stories of “liberated” women who actually enjoy watching their male partner crawl into a really snug-fitting swim brief and watch him get hard as the tension in the groin area builds. Is this fascination on the part of the couple considered normal or not normal?

Then how about two guys who both enjoy getting into and aroused in a swim brief, and they somehow discover that their interest is shared. Does that somehow make both guys gay and disinterested in sex with a female? Or are they just enjoying an activity they both like to do simultaneously, and it seems more fun that way as well? Are these guys somehow abnormal because they are enthusiastic about only this one shared activity? Should this remain a deep secret?

Let me start at the beginning. Nearly every human being likes to engage in self-stimulation, although females sometimes claim to have less interest in this than males normally do. I began learning these techniques at a very early age, and this quickly evolved into a fondness for any type of clothing that fit snug in my groin area. Over time, my collection grew as I found items that worked really well. Most guys masturbate with their hands using the classic slide-and-stroke method. What I do is usually not that, but even more fun, using methods I have honed over my entire life.

Take last night, for example. I was feeling rather horny and decided to sleep in a Desmiit swim brief. These briefs are small, but I have others that are even tighter fitting. I quickly fell asleep. As I have been known to do, I awakened at 3 AM, and started feeling myself. I was feeling hornier than I was when I fell asleep earlier, but there was still something missing. I decided I needed to be out of the swim brief and into a Thong. I pulled out a Papi Thong from the pile. Papi calls their underwear Fun but Functional. This looks like a rather “benign” thong, but it has an uncanny ability to hit all the “right” places. It likes to put upward pressure on the perineum area, a psychosexual “hot spot” of nerve endings located just behind my scrotum. Papi knows exactly where that hot spot is (the fun but functional part). Ahh, that feels good! There is this steady direct pressure that feels wonderful, and my body down there cannot ignore the sensations.

Some guys probably would go into full orgasm mode given what is happening to my body. I just hang in there thinking about how good everything feels, and I fall back asleep. I wake up this morning still feeling way horny and in need of an orgasm, but I will probably spend most of my day in that condition. The thong came off and I am back in my pair of super snug tighty whitey with a Tyr jammer over. Still feels really good down there! I have this edging technique down very well. I might be able to go another day or two in this unrelieved state. No rush for sure!

Think about this: What percentage of guys are so used to being in a swim brief that it does not “bother” them any more? I found this photo of a male Swimmer in a blue Speedo brief in one of their ads. To me, this guy appears to be “enjoying” his new brief a lot. The tension in the groin area must feel great. The situation the Speedo guy finds himself in may sell a lot of snug-fitting briefs for Speedo.

What percentage of guys would like to be in a swim brief that fits as snug as the one the swimmer in the ad is wearing, but, not being an athletic swimmer, are afraid of the questions that might arise if seen wearing a swim brief that snug and tight? What percentage of guys who have worn a swim brief immediately go into what I would call “heavy precum” mode—they are able to keep from going into a full uncontrolled ejaculation but they drip precum and the precum appears as little damp splotches in and around the penis tip given where it is positioned inside the pouch of the suit. These questions deserve a lot more research for sure.

[sebbie]

That’s a snug, fit, but just how I like it! I Miss These Brands and Items from Earlier Times

I admit it! I really enjoy feeling horny. For me, at least, its the best part about being a guy, and the best place to be no matter what. Being horny goes by any number of other names, the most mundane being feeling aroused. But that term does not convey what is really going on when I am feeling horny. Feeling horny for me is a complete experience, mind and body. Feeling “sexual” or “sexy” does not adequately capture what I enjoy so much. My mind is focused on the specific body parts that make me feel so good and want to think about nothing else. When I am feeling horny, I do not want to be distracted.

Even in earlier times, there were clothing items that were almost guaranteed to make a guy feel horny (aroused) Of course, back then, guys never talked about such things but especially not to their male peers. But all the guys kinda knew what might be going on in their minds and bodies. The desire to feel horny is all but universal among males, and maybe more than a little stressful too. Thinking back, I would have been a much happier person back then had I not been so stressed out over the situation. I think what “gets” to most guys is the fear that something might happen (say a full erection, or worse, an out-of-control orgasm). At an early age, guys learn that they must always try and be in control, and an inadvertent erection or orgasm is anything but the kind of control guys want to demonstrate. The erection for no apparent “reason” falls way outside of this effort to have everything under control. Still, if one can get past the sheer fear of an erection or even an orgasm, sheer pleasure may not be far off.

This leads me to my review of clothing items that had (and maybe still have) the ability to get me in a state of arousal. My mind tends to wonder to a guy’s first encounter having to wear something arousing, the classic example being a Speedo swim brief, but this list would also include a jock strap (aka athletic supporter) and maybe even a wrestling singlet or even compression gear in two pieces like a compression shorts and a compression tee.

For me, this all seems very tame at this point in my life, for I have had these items for many decades and can get into them practically any time I want. So far as the compression tees and shorts go, however, I am deeply saddened that the “Starter” brand gear, commonly found at Wal Mart over a decade ago is no longer available. You could always count on the Starter brand for a really snug fit that was like a second skin in both the tees and shorts. I still have a few pair of shorts in reasonably good shape and I am wearing a steel gray pair today as I exercise and write. Still, the snuggest and “toughest” compression shorts I ever owned were the Bollinger brand. I had a white pair and a black pair. I am not sure what happened to the white pair but I still have the black pair, and I still get horny just thinking about wearing them. These are one “mean” pair of compression shorts if you get what I am saying.

Despite never being an athlete in a team sport, I always liked a strap, and the snugger the fit the better. I know a lot of guys preferred the Bike Brand, but I was rather fond of the Duke brand that was also in a Wal Mart display in the Sporting Goods section. And the cups were really fun in that they pressed flat against the groin leaving little room for growth. But the snug fit and the combination of psychological and physical sensations of not having any extra room to grow were part of what made strap wear so much fun. The oversized cups they sell today are not nearly as much fun. Not much can beat a really small nearly-flat cup for sure but those are old school and not easy to find any more.

At some point I was lucky enough to have purchased a Sapphire Blue genuine Speedo swim thong. Speedo carried these for only a short period of time. They designed them to provided a bit more ample rear coverage than the swim thongs being sold today. Still, this thong was a lot of fun. It looks almost like a Solar brief from the front but the rear is a half inch wide strip of cloth that runs up the crack.

No list for me would be complete without mentioning the original Jockey men’s Thong underwear. These were all designed the same but came in various fabrics, the tamest was the one that was mostly cotton but with about 10% spandex. The other fabrics were Spandex/poly blends. In a word, these thongs were “undersized” and when you were wearing one your mind was constantly drawn to what you were wearing. Great fun, but maybe Jockey thought they were scaring off guys from wearing these. But what a treat! I was climbing the walls.

I have always liked tighty whiteys—as in combed cotton briefs, but I quickly discovered I liked these even better if they were undersized—a pair needs to be just big enough that when stretched out goes around my waist. Adult SM was just too big and roomy. But many Boys sizes have near an adult waist size. And were otherwise smaller and snugger fitting. I discovered that a Boys size 14 was about a 28-inch waist, and a Boys 12 was a 26-inch waist, and that I could fit into either. I have the smaller one under my Starter compression shorts today in fact. Feels great. Just the fit I like.

The problem is that it is no longer possible to simply walk into a discount house and find tighty whiteys in boys sizes, although I have been able to find them on line.

My final choice is the Club Swim "Euro" Brief. This was something of a House Brand for the US vendor Swimoutlet.com, but was replaced with swim briefs under the "Sporti" brand name.

I still have several Club Swim briefs in the Euro design. These are classic undersized swim briefs, but could be worn at the pool as "regular" swimwear. The sides are about 2 inches but somehow, they have a smaller fit than the Solar briefs do.

I discovered that the 28-inch waist size fit me well around the waist for me, but the sizing difference was that a 28-incher had a lower rise than the 30-inch size. This looks fine in front, but the 28 inch shows a bit of the butt-crack Y from the rear. Some guys might think this is perfectly OK at the pool, but others maybe not. The 28 incher reminds me of one of the Japanese Aqux suits in this regard.

Still, if you want a suit that says "I need to jerk off!" This is the suit to wear. I wear my Black Club Swim as sleepwear. The newer Sporti Euros are fine. I have a few of those too, but somehow the Club Swim Euro is the one that presses all my buttons!

This concludes my list, for today at least. Back to the rowing machine!

[sebbie]

More on Swim Briefs and Hand-Held Vibrators

I have been running some additional experiments employing a hand-held vibrator as a tool for helping to increase my arousal level in combination with a snug-fitting swim brief or a pair of compression shorts. Arousal is a tremendously complicated combination of events with both psychological and physical aspects. The physical ability to get and sustain an erection to orgasm is only part, although important part of that. And I would admit that what works well for me might not work as well for you, and particularly if you are a guy fixated only on getting and sustaining a firm erection leading to the muscular contractions that define having an orgasm in a snug fitting swim brief or pair of compression shorts or tights. What you wear plays a critical role in the quality of the stimulation the vibrator gives you, and it turns out that an undersized swim brief is the near ideal garment for these experiments.

I am very fond of edging, but my readers all know that, and the right swimwear and a magic wand vibrator helps me get there. I will explain my specific techniques in detail. Although like other guys, I really like having an orgasm too, but that is not the only aspect that sustains me. My at least equal interest is in starting and maintaining a situation of being psychologically aroused. I have had to explore some techniques for sustaining arousal that I might not have thought of when I was a 15-year-old teenager. Edging means starting and sustaining arousal for an extended time period without any particular regard for whether or not everything suddenly ends with a big erection, a final rush of stimulating sensations, and an orgasm. Having an orgasm might be one thing to think about, but it is not the only thing. A broader question is “am I feeling good down there in a curiously special way?” If I can answer yes, then I have achieved my main goal, and everything else positive that happens is a bonus extra.

So, what exactly am I doing to myself that involves a hand-held vibrator? That is the interesting part. These inexpensive handheld vibrators running on household current typically have a vibrating and rotating head on them, and an array of settings, often 20, that vary the speed and frequency of the vibration. One of these vibrators could be used for non-sexual massage of, say, sore muscles. But the real “fun” starts when the vibrator is applied to various body parts in the groin area.

My penis is clearly one of these body parts that might “appreciate” the pulsating and repeating stimulation of my swim brief-clad body. The problem is not that the vibrator doesn’t work when applied to a penis but that it simply works too well. Even on a flaccid penis, the vibrator can put you into a situation where the application of the vibrator leads to the distinct muscular contractions of an orgasm starting in only 15-30 seconds, and the “fun” is all over. The trick I have learned is to first spend time applying the vibrator head and first try the various settings to body areas that are not the penis, but are still psychosexually quite active. Where are these spots? There are a lot of spots on the male body that are active in this regard, but probably the best and most interesting one is the perineum area, sometimes called the taint area, the area on the body directly behind the scrotum. This is a collection of nerve endings that conveniently just happen to also be sexually active. Most of these are areas covered by a snug-fitting swim brief.

The idea is to start by stimulating the nerve endings that are in the perineum but also at the same time the back side of the balls pushing the vibrator head upward and slightly forward. So far as getting aroused goes, this is a great spot to kick back and enjoy the various speeds and patterns the vibrator is able to do. Some guys are also aroused by having the vibrator touch the vibrator head to the male nipples, though this has never quite done it for me.

I have also learned that directly applying the vibrator head to bare skin in the perineum does not feel as good as if the area is covered with cloth ideally that is slick and stretchy, but you will want the cloth to fit like a second skin especially around the balls, over the perineum and over the penis. That requires wearing something quite unlike a loose-fitting pair of cotton boxers, but instead something snug-fitting, the ideal being just the right swim brief or perhaps even an undersized pair of brief underwear in a poly-Lycra blend. Or maybe a tight-fitting pair of compression shorts or tights. The real treat from a psychological and sexual perspective happens when the perineum is stimulated with the vibrator head touching the slick cloth. I do not recommend doing this without some stretchy slick cloth between the skin and the head of the vibrator.

Keep doing this and you may discover that your penis, despite not being directly stimulated, is still starting to get erect as a consequence, even though the head of the vibrator has never touched the penis. Once that occurs, now is the time to try a moment or two of direct stimulation to your penis by touching it for a second or two lying under the slick cloth of what you chose to wear. Not too long, just a brief moment. If your penis has gotten even a bit hard from the stimulation of the balls and perineum, even that brief moment should feel terrific.

I complete my vibrator treatments and feel quite aroused, but I have not had an orgasm, and I would like to be still bigger as well. My penis still might not be hard, but it is certainly getting to that point.

Now is the time to put your penis in a vacuum device (VED or Penis Pump). I have discovered that these devices work far better and are more sheer fun if I am already quite aroused (as I would be after the treatment with the vibrator). So, I pump myself up to a full, vacuum-induced erection, drop a little silicone ring from the VED to the base of my penis, and remove the VED pump. The little silicone ring feels great on a super-hard penis. I am climbing the walls with pleasure! What a nice erection! I am enjoying myself tremendously both psychologically and physically. A little lube and I am nearly back to where I was when I was 15 I COULD easily have an orgasm at this point, as my penis surely wants one, but the edging is so enjoyable I might just wait some more.

[sebbie]

Just Having Fun by Myself

Guys have long had what I describe as a “love-hate” relationship with straps and thongs. It used to be a male “rite of passage” to acquire your first strap—the old school kind that exposed your butt cheeks and left your butt crack completely uncovered. That was only part of what made an old school strap interesting. The really wide elastic waistband, as much as 3 inches, was interesting But perhaps the most interesting part was the rubbery gritty texture to the pouch. And of course, a hard cup added yet another interesting dimension. Combine this with the fact that there might be a bunch of other males in the gym locker room parading around and showing their physiques while wearing only this as well, and this made for interesting times for a guy not “used” to doing this. Some guys were bound to have a “reaction” to the mere thought of getting into a strap and doing this, let alone actually doing it.

I confess, for me, getting to be in an old school strap is one of my favorite things to do, and I have a stash of them for just that purpose. I am wearing a favorite one of mine as I write this.

Men’s thongs came along a bit later in time, really in the 1980s. Thongs are fun in part because they touch in areas of the body a standard strap ignores. When I discovered that a properly fitting thong puts a nice pressure on the perineum, I was hooked. But I also quickly got hooked on the idea of the thong strap cinching between my glutes as I walked and exercised. It's a subtle but neat sensation, a sensation that tends to “grow on me as I move around during the day.

A properly fitting thong pushes the penis upward and forward, something that always feels good. But why not combine that with an old school strap, with that gritty feeling rubberized pouch trying to press me in the opposite direction. A conflict, for sure, but a fun conflict. The tricky part is finding a thong with a back narrow enough so that it cuts snug between the glutes but wide enough to constantly remind me that it is there and working its magic.

Would it surprise you to learn I am wearing a favorite thong under my Duke strap as I write this. This feels so neat it helps me think up and share ideas that you also might want to try.

But why stop there? Why not pull on a pair of my really snug fitting Tesla running tights (size SM). They feel really great and keep the pressure on the thong and strap in all the right places. I can go all day this way just enjoying my body and the sensations it produces. Being a guy is really fun! Especially when horny and sharing experiences with readers.

[sebbie]

More Having Fun

Generally, guys face two major problems in life. At a very young age a guy learns that it is entirely possible to get an erection or even have an orgasm at a place in a situation that is neither private nor appropriate. When I was twelve, erections seemed to be fleeting events, events that came and went for no apparent reason and with no apparent reason. For me, this started at about age 12, or maybe even earlier than that.

It was not long before I discovered that just having an erection could be quite an enjoyable experience, and it was not that long after that I started “encouraging” them to happen in various ways. The tricky part was the privacy issue. I knew that I needed to be either alone or working under cover of darkness—that is, playing with being asleep under the covers when in fact I was engaging in “self-abuse”. I soon picked up on all sorts of ways to do this, perhaps my favorite was getting an erection started by hand and then rubbing the underside of my penis onto the sheet. Sometimes this made me cum, but if I did this early enough at night the cum stains would be dry by morning, which was a relief, and the starchy splotches on my pajama bottoms also at least dry. But still I always worried that I would somehow, perhaps inadvertently have an orgasm too far into the morning that the stain would not be dry by the time I awoke and got dressed for school. That was embarrassing. I worried that I needed to get my timing correct.

I was also having problems with ejaculating in situations where I really did not want to deal with the issues. There were long bus rides to and from school over gravel roads, and the bus seats seemed to vibrate a lot. This would sometimes be plenty strong enough to lead to a full-blown ejaculation and the stains meant that I needed to exit the bus with some care. Fortunately, this almost never happened on the early morning rides. So, getting off the bus I was into a private home setting, not school.

A lot of guys seem to think that they would be extremely happy if their mind could be the only thing that could tell their body when they should be aroused, when they should have an erection and exactly when ejaculation should or should not occur. But a basic problem is that this is not how the male body works, at least for much of the time. Arousal comes and goes pre-erection, if at all. Not every arousal leads to an erection. Erections come and go, and not every erection leads to an ejaculation. In short, a major part of becoming an adult male involves developing an understanding that a lot of this does not occur in an orderly way, and if some of the disorder embarrasses the guy, that is the way it is. Deal with it!

So, the second problem the now adult males must deal with is not the problem of getting an erection that they do not want, but rather that of not getting an erection when the time is appropriate, and they do want one. This quickly gets into some complicated stuff involving things that turn on a guy and set the arousal process in motion. Large numbers of books have been written on the subject. One conclusion is that it is far easier to get an erection when you do not want one than it is to get an erection that you want but your body somehow refuses to go along. If the mere thought of wearing a snug-fitting swim brief sends a guy not only into an erection but maybe even an orgasm, why is it often so difficult for a guy who desperately wants an erection but his body refuses to go along with the desire?

Over the years, I have learned lots of stuff about what my body likes down there and exactly what thoughts get me horny. I “play” with this stuff on a regular basis, but tossed into another world, a world in which I would have to perform for a partner, I might easily fail in my efforts. Yet, what I have learned about myself and my body could prove useful in partner sex as well.

[sebbie]

The Speedo® Challenge

For guys at least, the desire to feel horny is all but universal. Guys generally realize that they can easily get into the mode of feeling horny when they are wearing something that fits snugly in the area containing their penis and balls. Better still if whatever is snug fitting is made of a stretchy smooth cloth as well. Guys generally like the feel of this in the groin area and come to realize this at a very young age, perhaps even before puberty has fully set in. There is just something erotically going on in such a situation.

But guys also realize that the marvelous instance when a guy feels horny can quickly lead to other stuff happening, like getting big and hard. While this is also very enjoyable, this can lead to male “problems” such as the idea that others may notice what is happening. And this can lead to situations that are not only embarrassing, but especially lead to teasing and bullying by peer males—a particular problem for teenagers.

A basic issue is an unwritten “rule” that says a guy should only get aroused or get a hard on when with a sexual partner, and for a lot of males, the only acceptable sexual partner is a female, presumably a willing one. If a guy is with a male in some way and gets a hard on, that therefore is “proof” that the guy is gay. Obviously this may not be the case, but that does not mean that guys do not worry about inadvertently being labeled as gay if the erection occurs in any instance that does not involve a female.

The classic Speedo® thus presents a problem for many guys. First. The brief is made of slick, stretchy cloth that fits snugly around the penis and balls. The penis is (usually) fully covered, but the outline of the guy’s anatomy is quite obvious, and, in particular, the condition the guy is in. Guys with big flaccid penises have more issues in this regard, because the may appear to be erect when they are not. A lot of guys will not wear swim briefs because they do not want to have to deal with this, even though at some level they are turned on by the idea of wearing a skimpy brief made of a slick, stretchy material. It is not simply wearing the brief but the idea of wearing the brief in a situation where they will be seen in public. For first time wearers, they do not know exactly what will happen to them once inside, but they fear the worst. This leads to admiring the guys who wear Speedos® seemingly without giving it all a second thought. Just another article of clothing and zero concerns over inadvertent arousal and erections!

Still, nothing that fits that tight in the groin area can be completely innocuous. Guys who have not yet worn a swim brief from any manufacturer are also bothered by the perhaps well-founded perception that the guys who do wear the briefs are somehow enjoying them in a sexual way, even if they have overcome the urge to be erect once they are in the brief. This becomes a mixture of fear and wonderment of sorts. Dare I do this or not? How will my body react if I do? Can I try on a Speedo® in private, and my bedroom first, and see exactly how all of this happens to me or not?

If I end up “liking” being in a Speedo® and I end up feeling horny once I am in and start to get erect, what does that mean? Does that somehow make me gay? Even more complicated are questions related to situations where I have a male friend who somehow has also thought about the same issues and is in this position of wanting to try on a swim brief too. What if we both get swim briefs and try them on at the same time/ Does that somehow make us both gay? Complicated questions here.

And then there are the women. A lot of women claim they dislike seeing any man wearing any sort of swim brief--many women, but not necessarily all. If I have a girlfriend, what is she going to say if she sees me wearing one? Part of the rules many females abide by is the debunked idea that men should only get horny and erect in the presence of a female who is or will become a sexual partner for intercourse, and the rest of the stuff I am talking about is for guys who are “abnormal”.

The entire connection between wearing a Speedo® and being gay is a complicated one. Speedo® until relatively recently, simply ignored the notion that wearing one and being gay could be linked for some guys, but now you go to their Web Site and in the briefs there is an entire section of maybe a dozen briefs either in rainbow colors, Gay Pride logos or some combination. Are these all sold to gay guys, or to guys who support the gay movement by wearing one of the briefs? I doubt the company would even know.

I am also very interested in the YouTube videos by Christian Ocean, a blogger fascinated with the question of how a guy who has never before worn a swim brief or a thong in public will deal with the situation. Somehow he finds guys that while having never done this before, are not put off by the idea.

Of course, the swim briefs Speedo® offers under their own brand are modest by what you can get from other online sources. They used to sell a thong, but no longer do. And the vast majority of briefs have wide sides, typically 2 ½ inches or wider, the Solar brief being slightly skimpier. Mostly the choices relate to colors and fabrics, and no longer just solid colors but a vast array of prints and fabrics.

Nowadays, a guy can go on line and find an array of swim briefs and thongs that are way snugger and skimpier than that, make an order for some of those, and experiment in private. The number of vendors and the choices suggest that this is a very popular thing for guys to do. Relatively recent are the briefs and thongs being sold to perhaps be worn either as skimpy underwear or as swimwear. The guys wearing these as swimwear have clearly gotten over any fear they might have had of appearing in public in clothing that is really skimpy in the groin.

Progress is being made! Have fun in your Speedos® and enjoy who you are.

[sebbie]

Notes for Guys considering first time wearing a Speedo®

Male sexuality can seem very complicated. At an early age, guys discover that feeling horny (aka arousal) can be very enjoyable. Once puberty comes on the role of erections and having an orgasm that results in ejaculate takes on a critical role as well. Feeling horny is fun! Getting a hard on is even more fun! Ejaculating semen is right up there with the most fun things a guy can do!

The difficulty, of course, is that also at a very early age a guy discovers that he cannot directly control any of these events. He can set up situations whereby these events are more likely to occur, or not. But sometimes part or all of this can occur, well, inadvertently. A key problem younger guys face, at least, is that he realizes these events are supposed to occur in the presence of a (female) sexual partner, not alone, or perhaps even with another male. Yet, somehow a guy’s body pays zero attention to that “rule”. But even if this were true, does this mean that a guy needs to manage to delay getting aroused, getting a hard on, or ejaculating until he is old enough to be seriously in a relationship with a sexual partner?

Obviously not. Guys get horny, get erections and have orgasms regularly when they are not with anyone else, let alone a sexual partner. As a young person, this is all part of growing up. This is also “training” of sorts on how to cope with a male body that sometimes simply “ignores” what the mind thinks it should be doing. Dealing with all of this is simply part of entering adulthood.

What does this have to do with wearing a Speedo® for the first time? I was hooked on the idea of wanting to wear a Speedo® from the moment I saw what they were and how they fit in the groin area, Well, maybe not a genuine Speedo® but any male swim brief made from a shiny, stretchy, snug-fitting material. I already knew quite a bit about my penis from my wet dreams, which I quickly mastered techniques to “encourage" them. That rubbing and stroking my penis was really enjoyable, and I naturally assumed that my penis would greatly “enjoy” being snugly encased in a brief made of soft and slick material. Owning a Speedo® or similar was an important make rite of passage even if it was only as a garment used masturbation, not for swimming, but a garment every male should still own.

Turns out, I was correct. Let me also say this about sexuality. Part of what makes sexuality so much fun with a sexual partner is that it seems to work better when there is a degree of uncertainty about what is about to happen and exactly what will happen and how good it will feel. For married guys, or even guys in a long-term relationship with a partner, if these relationships are to be successful over a long term, them both individuals need to make sure that partner sex has not become very predictable and therefore boring. Penises hate predictability. Penises much prefer situations that are snug but unpredictable. (This is also true for the comparable parts of the female anatomy as well, but I won’t go into that here.)

So, feeling uncertain about how you and your penis will “react” to being in a Speedo® for the very first time is a good thing not a bad thing. If you are contemplating all of this and have purchased any swim brief with the intent of trying it on in private, you probably already have discovered the horniness part already. How will my body react once I am in the brief and will I be able to keep my urges under control? This uncertainty is part of the fun, not a problem.

More interesting still is having a male buddy (I will not refer to him as a male partner) who somehow is open enough to reveal that he would like to do the same thing—try on a Speedo® for the very first time. That could get interesting too, as each contemplates his own response but the response of the other. Is such an event somehow “gay”? Some guys might say so, but others might say it's all just a very normal part of being a male. I tend to fall in the latter camp. Just because a guy gets aroused by pulling on a swim brief in the presence of another male who is also doing the same thing and experiencing something similar has zero to do with whether a guy will ultimately decide to enter in a sexual relationship with either another male or instead with a female. A lot of guys seem to not understand that at all and that leads to unwarranted teasing and bullying situations.

Coping with how your body reacts to situations your body sees as “novel” is part of becoming an adult. And part of this is built around the realization that with sexuality, orders that you might want to give in any situation might be rejected at another level. Deal with that! It is part of who you are as a human being.

So, if a guy becomes aroused, gets an erection, and maybe even ejaculates into his newly-acquired Speedo® this should not be cause for alarm or somehow be feared. The biggest issue is to how to wash out the ejaculate and dry the brief without alerting others. The next time this guy tries it on, the sensations will be more familiar, and the stress might be less. Maybe this time the guy experiences an erection but manages to stave off ejaculation. Technically, this guy is doing what I would call edging with a Speedo, something that can quickly become a quite pleasant thing to do on a regular basis.

The novelty of the situation at hand is really what fuels the arousal, erection and ejaculation. If the guy were not at least somewhat uncertain about what could happen once in the Speedo, none of this would likely happen. But this novelty and uncertainty is what fuels the sexual fires on multiple levels. It fuels the purchase of swim briefs that are ever tighter and skimpier, the swim thong movement, and furthering an understanding of what feels really good to wear.

All of this is fun stuff and no functioning male should deny himself!

[sebbie]

TMI?

Men’s swim briefs are not normally advertised on the many streaming channels. However, the ads that appear on the streaming channels are getting more and more detailed, and outlining topics that were long ruled inappropriate for broadcast TV because they contained too much information.

I was thinking about this text for a swim brief ad on a streaming channel. But then I started thinking this information might work better as text for a hang tag on each brief sold, designed to alert new buyers of issues with wearing the swim brief. With all of the increasingly explicit advertising on TV, why not make the buyer aware of this issue on the hang tag, where fabric care is usually the topic.

“A properly fitting swim brief should fit quite snug for best performance in the water. The cloth will stretch a little as the brief is worn, so in order to keep the snug fit it is best to downsize one waist size. Be aware that many males when initially wearing a swim brief experience unexpected reactions, and this could lead to an inadvertent and unexpected erection. Occasionally this can result in an ejaculation. Be aware that for most males this reaction to wearing a new, properly-fitting swim brief is normal and the issue normally recedes after the wearer has worn the brief for a few times. Ejaculate can ordinarily be removed from the brief by soaking the brief in warm (not hot) water. Please hand wash to improve the durability and retain the stretch.”