Thoughts on just being a guy

[sebbie]

How Often Should a Guy Have Fun?

What an interesting question! Of course, I do not mean fun in a general sense, but in a specific sense, actually a VERY specific sense. I am thinking back to that point in time when I was quite young, and had only recently “discovered” that there was something very special about being a guy. Every once and a while I would find myself thinking that somehow I was really enjoying myself, and I thought the special feelings were somehow linked to something weird that was happening in my groin area. It was weird. I knew I was feeling good, but these odd and wonderful sensations I was experiencing, though somehow focused on my lower body were quickly making my entire “being” feel somehow supercharged.

Not long after I learned that other guys my age were smiling and describing this situation as “feeling horny”. Even more interestingly these same guys were trying to find ways to “stimulate” these sensations in the old days by getting copies of magazines with photos of nude females and, of course, describing encounters they had or fantasized about happening with females they knew that were of similar age. How traditional can you get, anyway? While having little if an y interest in these activities myself, I was always taking mental notes on what the other guys were doing and, on occasion, explaining to their male friends. The conclusion I reached is that there is no fixed method guys use in order to feel horny, and such an occurrence can be brought on in a variety of ways. Further, practically every guy at some level believes that what he likes to do to feel horny is somehow “different” from what any other male his age likes to do to accomplish the same thing, and therefore must be “abnormal” (except, of course for the desire to have sex with a female).

For me, the curious thing about feeling horny was the strange intermingling of the mental with the physical. A guy could feel horny simply by forming mental images of an erotic situation, the specifics of the image being as unique to each guy as his individual fingerprints. If I somehow dared describe for you the details of the images that turn me on, you might very well say “that does nothing for me at all,” and vice versa.

But then there is also the physical aspect. An interesting question is why so many teen males are fearful of garments that fit snug in the groin area, examples being swim briefs and athletic supporters. I guess this is because many guys think that in donning the garment they may very well not only feel quite horny but suddenly also get an uncontrolled erection and that erection may happen in a space (say a locker room) where other males might see. This is terrifying. But the funny part about all of this is that guys LIKE to be in this predicament except for the part where other guys somehow discovered what was happening to you and made fun of you because of this.

By the time I was 14, I was probably having episodes of feeling horny several times a day, even without being in a strap or swim brief while still just thinking about how much fun it would be to be able to pull on a strap or swim brief in private and then jerk off in the tight garment to an explosion of semen. Then I would be contemplating how to get the mess I had created cleaned up before someone else discovered what I had managed to do to, with and by myself.

Many, many years have passed. As time has gone by, I learned new methods for feeling horny while better controlling when and how these events occurred. In all these years I have never lost interest in feeling horny, though nowadays I can go several weeks without getting myself into that state. And I learned that on the porn sites the idea of edging occupies a special place for many males pursuing solo sex in front of the video camera. The video guys like to say I have gone maybe a week or more without jerking off, and then the test is to see how long they can go manually stimulating themselves while still deferring a full orgasm. As a guy gets older it typically becomes easier to edge for long periods of time, even though this becomes more and more difficult the longer the time has been since the last orgasm. Edging is really fun stuff while completely avoiding the complexities of partner sex.

Currently, I have not felt horny in maybe 3-4 weeks. But this morning I got up and I said to myself “this morning I really want to be in a strap. So I quickly found a snug old-school basic strap, and sure enough, feeling that coarse textured rubberized pouch feels really good against my penis. I fully understand why males have this dual fondness for and hatred of these old school athletic supporters.

Well, I can't make it through the day wearing only a strap. The scheme that works for me is to pull a pair of SM Tesla running tights over. These feel really good too, and just touching my penis through the tights and strap feels sensational. So, I am feeling nice and horny as I am writing this and realize that I could be feeling like this all day long. This becomes a day-long form of edging that I am undergoing as I write this on this day. I am having a lot of fun as I write this and you can have fun too, even though my techniques might work differently for you than me. The important part is that you find the methods that work well for you!

[PSDave]

OMG, Sebbie, you need help. Get out and swim in the pool, go to the gym or whatever strikes your fantasy. Sitting at your computer authoring endless anthologies is not the best way to use your time. (maybe even talk to a therapist or counselor) Dont sit there analizing life -- live it!























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[sebbie]

I am delighted that the two story lines I developed (What to Wear, and Thoughts on Just Being a Guy) have gotten as many followers together summing to over 250,000 hits. I have made an effort to cover a variety of topics related to guys but in particular for guys who are not into a partnered relationship. In the process I would like to believe that I have written on a number of topics guys seldom if ever talk about.

This has been a long journey for me, and the first page of What to Wear was posted in April of 2015. A lot of things have happened since then. I always assumed that if anyone did not find what I was writing to be interesting and perhaps also useful, they would no longer go back to read my latest post, and maybe some guys have done that, but with every new post lots of readers still see what I have to say.

I realize I cannot continue to write on these topics indefinitely, and a few people have claimed that I keep discussing many of the same or similar topics over and over. I am starting to wind this all down. I will not say that this is my last post because I probably will dream up something new that I want to post. Lets just say that future posts will be less frequent.

All the best to all my readers who have been my devoted followers.

Sebbie

[dm106]

Thanks, Sebbie. I have enjoyed your rantings!

[sebbie]

Does That Fit Tight Enough For You?

Today, I reach a birthday milestone that somehow got me to thinking about my long-term relationship with snug-fitting clothing. I believe I developed a fondness for garments that fit snug in the groin area before I knew anything about sex or sexual feelings at all. What I did conclude at a very early age is that I was fond of any garment that fit me snug and tight down there, even though I had not rationalized why.

Of course, as I grew older things started happening down there—interesting things that I did not seem to have much if any control over. At one level, this was nothing short of terrifying. But at a completely different level, I was fascinated by what was happening to me. I noticed that my penis could get bigger and then smaller again without me overtly doing anything.

I soon discovered that the mere thought of going into anything in a brief style would make me horny and erect. I liked what happened to me at this mere thought even without the opportunity to actually pull on a brief. Somehow I also realized that the smooth texture of a nylon or spandex/poly brief would feel really great pressed against my penis, and doing this quickly became a goal. But it was not until I was older, in College, actually, that I got to actually purchase a couple Speedos and test out some of what I had thought about. I was not disappointed and in grad school I quickly learned that jerking of in my Speedos was a great relaxer in what was an otherwise near continuous high-pressure situation. I enjoyed myself a lot in those days and my Speedos paid a significant role in helping me survive my graduate program, despite the fact that I never swam in them, they were still quite “useful”.

My next “experiment” involved checking out the fit and feel of an athletic supporter. You see, I never participated in a team sport requiring on in either high school or college. However, I was still fascinated with “the look”. I always thought the cups were interesting as well, particularly the cups that fit so snug that there was no “room to grow” without pressing against the walls of the cups. The straps I bought did not disappoint either, and I quickly got hooked on the sensations coming from a hardening penis that was limited in how much it could grow because of the firm cup walls. Great fun for the price of the strap and cup!

My introduction to underwear thongs for men did not happen till much later, I think in 1988 when I first saw thong underwear for men in a store. when I first saw them I bought three. I was fascinated by having a stretchy cord between my glutes. And I realized that if my penis grew, even inadvertently, that would pull on and cinch up the thong back between my glutes. Most interesting.

Not long after that I decided to put a cupped strap over the thong. Compression shorts were just becoming popular as well, and I got to thinking that a tight-fitting compression short would not only feel great, but would hold the thong/strap cup combination firmly in place. True, my penis might “plead for “relief” from the predicament it was in on multiple fronts, but it was stuck with the situation it was in. I also discovered that if I did want to provide myself with momentary “relief” by pulling everything down, my penis would respond by getting a bit bigger and harder, and then when I got back into everything, the horny tension would actually increase not decrease.

Then I decided to try wearing this combination to bed, something as an experiment to see if I would go through traditional erect/flaccid cycles during sleep wearing this, and would I ejaculate while asleep inside the thong and cup. The experiment is most interesting for sure. Every guy should try it.

So, here I am, celebrating my 75th year and thinking about all the great things that I have done by, with and to myself over all these years. Not only has it all been great fun—its still great fun!

[Lap Counter]

Happy Birthday, Sebbie!
I’ve been reading your essays for years and continue to look forward to your next.

[Fairfax]

Reading your thoughts Sebbie made me realise why I first became interested in briefs.
I first new I liked wearing nothing but my underpants as a seven year old long before any sexual connection and when I got my first pair of proper lycra swim briefs at age 8 I was hooked.
I always thought it was the super hero feel or the comfort that got my attention but you made me realise it was the mildly pleasant feeling of presure on the crotch.
As soon as I hit puberty I discovered it was sexual in origin and the pleasure was instensified if I had an erection as well.
My swim briefs soon became an arousal aid and I found myself with a swimwear fetish.
What I found frustrating was the way you seem to think all males are the same yet it was obvious to me from about age 14 that most other guys weren't getting the pleasure I did.
I think only some guys are sensitive there and even most of them don't have the interest to explore it further.
Thanks again for your thoughts and opinions they did fill in some blanks for me.

[Lap Counter]

Originally Posted by Fairfax

What I found frustrating was the way you seem to think all males are the same yet it was obvious to me from about age 14 that most other guys weren't getting the pleasure I did.
I think only some guys are sensitive there and even most of them don't have the interest to explore it further.

I’ve thought a lot about that too, but put a different interpretation on that seeming lack of interest. All guys have the same plumbing and electrical systems, so the same stimulus should affect them the same. But I think learned social inhibition short-circuits their response.

In my school, jockstraps were required starting in 7th grade. I well remember the embarrassment suffered by boys who popped an erection while putting on or taking off theirs in the locker room, complete with jokes and harassment from everyone else. That quickly taught us to rechannel the nerve signals received about how our genitals felt in that confined pouch.

Similarly, Speedos, especially the old-style nylon ones, accurately reveal the state of tumescence of the wearer, so avoiding boners in public is a good idea. Sadly for the sport of swimming, many guys do that by avoiding Speedos entirely, instead turning wearing one into a joke. I’ve always liked the challenge of walking the length of the beach without the cool feeling I got wearing a Speedo becoming obvious to casual observers.

Rather than avoid the stimulation he gets from tight clothes, Sebbie simply acknowledges and celebrates it.

[sebbie]

I like a tight fit—a really really tight fit

A key part of the process of growing into an adult male is learning how to deal with sexual sensations of various sorts. Sexual pleasure is this complicated mixture of the physical and the psychological. A guy learns some of the details by himself but also by picking up on what his male peers are doing either by simply observing or by what other males may say about all of this.

It turns out that some males have no difficulty boasting about their conquests with sexual partners. For straight guys this is commonplace. There may be some parallels for gay guys too. But the topic that is usually kept secret relates to solo sex aka masturbation aka self-pleasuring.

The secrecy involves the idea that if males were open with their male peers about what they like to do on their own for pure pleasure, their peers would think the less of them as in this guy is so unappealing, he cannot find a date. Somehow this has evolved into the (wrong!) idea that guys whop masturbate on a regular basis must be gay and admitting that you are hooked on self-pleasuring means that you are also gay.

Still, I have enjoyed myself this way for probably 65 of my 75 years and my enthusiasm for the activity has not abated in the least. But I am also very curious about the whole subject of whether or not I have tried everything interesting and fun in this department, or whether there are still interesting things to do in that department that I have not tried.

One of the fascinating things about this blog is that a lot of guys here openly admit that they find that self-abuse in a swim brief is a really fun thing to do with essentially no down-side (unless a peer or friend/relative/parent accidentally discovers you in a Speedo bearing a full erection (or worse). That is good to know for sure, and it is nice to have this information even at this late date in my life. The worst part about this cleaning up the mess you may have created undetected.

The Internet is a great source of information that provides detailed video on self-pleasuring inaccessible not that many years ago, and there appears to be no shortage of guys enthusiastic about making the videos so long as faces and identities are not revealed. However, in a popular site like pornhub there is what they call a straight section and a gay section and somehow all the male self-pleasuring videos arbitrarily end up in the gay section as if gay guys approve of self-pleasuring but this is not something a straight guy would ever want to do.

A really fun thing to do in a swim brief is to get in a horny “mood” and then pull on the swim brief, making certain that you are just firm enough so that the only semi comfortable way for your penis to be is pointed upward, with the slick cloth of the brief pressing tightly against the ultrasensitive underside of your penis. This is male self-pleasuring nirvana for sure and every male needs a brief (or two, or three..) just to be able to do this on a regular basis.

This is what I call the classic “Christopher Atkins” method of self-pleasuring, made famous in a Dallas Episode where Atkins (as Peter Richards LOL) appears in a standard but very snug fitting Sapphire blue Speedo but with the underside of his penis pressing firmly against the brief material. A mere touch of the brief where this is going on would send him into Speedo brief self-pleasuring nirvana. This all occurs in season 7 episode 4 of the nighttime soap opera “Dallas” now streaming free. And photos of Atkins of this exact situation are also on the Internet.

A lot of readers of this blog are very fond of wearing as skimpy and low-cut swim brief as possible, briefs consisting maybe of a small pouch, string sides and a thong back. In self-pleasuring, to each his own, but this style of brief makes it impossible to engage in the kind of thing Christopher Atkins was up to—as in putting direct slick pressure on the entire underside of the semi-erect and growing penis that I also find so intensely enjoyable.

Go to the video sites such as pornhub, and there are any number of short videos showing a guy masturbating to ejaculation inside a snug-fitting (but not too tiny) swim brief. If you are looking to learn techniques used by other guys this is the place to be. Some guys use their hands—other guys, interestingly, not, and the simple pressure of the tight brief on the underside of the penis is enough for an actual “hands free ejaculation" in only a few minutes.

There are also wrestling singlet masturbation videos. A wrestling singlet is much larger than a swim brief but is made of a similar slick stretchy material. Again, some guys do a hands-on masturbation to ejaculation, with drops of precum creating small spots here and there at various places on the front of the singlet until ejaculation (cumming) occurs and the singlet has lots of “cream” on the front. Other guys do a hands-free version of getting entirely hard with only the pressure from the slick cloth and end up ejaculating anyway.

The fact that getting into and out of a singlet that is just a touch undersized can prove difficult adds to the pleasure, in part because the guy soon feels that he is in a situation where the urge to get harder and then ejaculate is governed in part by a situation that he does not fully control, just being driven in part by being stuck or constrained inside the singlet. For those that have never tried this using a singlet I would argue that this is a not-to-be-missed technique.

Finally, it is time to mention the wonders of the so-called magic wand vibrator with the head capable of multiple speeds and patterns. Let's say you are feeling horny and have your somewhat erect penis pressing hard against the cloth of the brief or singlet. Psychologically too you are already feeling quite good. But the trick is to power up the magic wand, find one of those great stop-start wand vibrator patterns that are so much fun, and then merely touch the vibrator repeatedly to a spot on the underside of your spandex cloth covered penis.

This scheme works so well that you can easily be ejaculating not instantly but maybe in 30 seconds or less. The trick of course is to develop a technique with the vibrator such that you don’t immediately feel those wonderful ejaculatory contractions. This means taking away the vibrating head almost but not quite there and use this as an edging method to build the sexual tension over and over. A penis with its underside pressing firmly against a Spandex-laced material and a magic wand vibrator in the self-pleasuring world is a match made in heaven, and I would be hard pressed to claim that there is anything in the partner sex world that quite matches it for overall sexual pleasure.

The methods I have discussed here take male self-pleasuring to an all-new level, are completely safe, do not result in the transmission of an STD nor a pregnancy, and can be pursued by any male who is in a situation where there is privacy.

[sebbie]

Thong underwear and the sapphire blue Speedo® Part 1

I think I got my first pair of thong underwear in early 1989. Three pairs came in a box each in a different color. The brand name was Hom®. As I recall, thong underwear designed for men had become increasingly popular in western Europe, and maybe in parts of Asia as well, but the design was considered too radical to be salable to the more conservative American males, who at the time were all still wearing cotton briefs or boxers.

From the moment I saw the thongs, I knew I had to have them. I liked to masturbate a lot, but my preferred technique was with the aid of a nylon and then poly/spandex blend swim brief, or by wearing finding the most undersized pair of tighty whiteys and then crawling into the most snug-fitting jeans in my closet. I did a lot of this starting with when I entered adulthood and was out on my own. Maybe too much, I thought, but then there never seemed to be any ill effects and I always enjoyed myself tremendously.

Still, from the moment I made my thong purchase, I knew the thongs were going to be something special. I was not aware of the fact that I was entering a phase that would be like a male master course in male self-pleasuring.

The Hom® thongs were built on what I call the European design—stretchy, poly/spandex-laced fabric, minimal pouch size made from this fabric, skimpy sides. And then there was the back—the wonderful back that consisted of simply an elastic cord only about 3/16 inch in diameter. This cord was so skimpy and stretchy that the only possible way it could fit was positioned not over the butt crack, but deep between the glutes from the top of my butt crack to just behind the male scrotum.

The thin elastic cord had to be connected to the front pouch and the two parts were sewn together, making a lump at the lower end of the pouch just behind the scrotum.

The first problem I faced after removing a thong from the box is what goes where and how to I get into something so stretchy and skimpy? Obviously my penis is supposed to fit inside the pouch. But the ease by which I could do that would be more difficult if I was anything other than fully flaccid, and merely ATTEMPTING to get my penis inside the pouch was making me grow and get hard. The dilemma was that the more I struggled the more difficult it was becoming to get my penis entirely into the pouch.

The other “problem” is what to do with my balls. After struggling and finally after some effort getting my penis inside the pouch, I though that my balls were supposed to be inside not outside the pouch too. Flaccid this could be possible...but already being somewhat erect and hard this would be a real struggle. Somehow I managed but by then I was oozing drops of precum on the brand-new thong pouch. But if I left my balls outside the cord of the back would act like a ball splitter, and I figured that was not the way the thong was intended to be worn at all. Penis and balls belonged inside the little stretchy pouch, together.

The really interesting part was that with both the penis and balls inside the pouch then that little knot that ties the rear cord to the pouch ends up just behind the scrotum. In 1989 I knew nothing about that male sexual hit spot of nerve endings located exactly where the thong knot is positioned, but somehow, I knew I had discovered a hot spot that was making me feel really horny—frankly, the sensation from that spot was blowing me away.

So, what I learned in those early days of attempting to wear the Hom thong that just putting one on was arousing fun. But once in place I should get used to the feel of the cord between my butt cheeks with every step I took. And further, each step stimulated the perineum area by tugging on the cord putting upward pressure on the perineum and tugging on the pouch, a pouch that contained my penis and balls and a situation where I seemed to be getting still harder and oozing precum in those wonderful small, glistening droplets. This stimulation was getting tougher to deal with but more fun minute-by-minute. I could tug at the cord back as well which not only would put neat upward pressure on the perineum as the cord shortened, but also provide more stimulation to my penis inside the snug pouch.

Still, perhaps the most wonderful part of all is the “conflict” that occurs should I (inadvertently LOL) get bugger and harder while in the pouch. The cord back “wants” to pull my penis and balls downward and this happens over and over as I walk and take each step. The sensations tend to make me harder and still more horny. But the pouch is tugging in the opposite direction upward and forward, tugging on the cord in the opposite direction, and as I get bigger and harder the cord shortens putting more upward pressure on my perineum. It goes without saying that this “conflict” is fabulous erotic pleasure.


Continues in subsequent post