Thoughts on just being a guy

[sebbie]

Intensify IV Part A

One of the amazing aspects of being a guy is that at age 12, I was having great fun learning about all the interesting and extremely enjoyable stuff my body what capable of delivering to me, and figuring that by the time I grew up all of this would be so familiar to me that I would be mostly bored as there would be nothing new or interesting yet to learn. But here I am in my 70s, still exploring, still trying things with at least as much enthusiasm as a school kid who has just reached puberty, and I am no longer scared at all. For me it is all pure erotic pleasure, to be savored and enjoyed to the fullest.

Back when I was only 12, as I watched my first real daytime ejaculation complete with strands of milky semen, as if that part of my body was somehow disconnected from the rest of me. I guess I was worried that I somehow had “broken something” and had a serious medical problem. Today, in my 70s and no longer having a prostate, I know something is broken thanks to the surgeon, but I have not in any way lost my enthusiasm for playing around with my body. Indeed the situation has freed me to be even more interested in the whole science behind the entire subject of feeling aroused and what that entails. This has led me to this conclusion that most guys are probably too enamored with the idea of getting to the ejaculation part quickly, and that the whole male sex drive is centered primarily on the idea of ejaculating semen. But if you have built your entire life around getting to the moment of ejaculation, you have missed out on what makes being a guy so fascinating, and further, being sexually active in this way is even more rewarding and fascinating than merely watching your penis spew strands of the milky white fluid.

And, I keep learning new stuff. After a guy loses his prostate, the two questions are 1. Can I still have an orgasm? And 2. Can I still get an erection? But as guys grow older even with intact prostates they are probably still thinking about these questions and what happens in aging. More generally, with the things I thought were really enjoyable when I was 12 or 13 still be great fun when I reach old age, or even maybe even not-so-old age. If a guy thinks that the only fun part of being a sexually active male is in the act of depositing semen into a vagina (or in some other similarly-shaped orifice) and has no room for anything other than that then this guy is missing out on much of what makes being a guy so enjoyable. Being sexually active does not mean simply always having a sexual relationship with another person. Indeed if the relationship issues start to overwhelm the other parts the guy may very well be in trouble. This all comes right back to the idea if the guy somehow equates being sexually active with ejaculating semen into a convenient orifice supplied by a sexual partner and there is nothing else that is sexually exciting or even interesting.

From about age 10 or so I had convinced myself that I had a serious sexual fetish, defined as a mental problem, and this was because I got sexually excited whenever I thought about being inside a swim brief. A lot of this was rooted in the notion that by definition, a sexual fetish was any situation whereby a guy got aroused by some inanimate object no matter what that object was. What was this fixation/fetish I had, anyway? A serious mental problem that required psychiatric help? I was well into adulthood until I came to the realization that I was not the only guy out there who liked swim briefs in this way, and also that, on occasion, a lot of guys liked to jerk off in a Speedo and they also thought that doing this was pure fun but also safe fun (unless a family member or classmate wandered in on you while you were doing it).

Well, if the clinical psychiatrists spent time treating male patients suffering from the disease of wanting to jerk off while wearing a tight-fitting Speedo, there would be no time whatsoever for patients with other mental “problems”. Not only that, for a guy who has lost his prostate like I did, maybe crawling into a snug fitting Speedo is one path and a treatment of sorts helpful in restoring the ability to both get an erection and sustain at least the repeating muscular contractions of an orgasm. Also, generally after prostate surgery, the Cowpers remains intact, so even though there is no more semen ejaculate, the guy is still able to ooze. Further, precum production becomes a central focus, and edging and precum are intertwined as is pointed out over and over in the Internet videos. Oozing is still great fun, and if I can still ooze in the absence of a prostate that is a key element of feeling good.

So I admit that getting and sustaining a full erection is more difficult when the prostate is absent. For me at least, more difficult, but definitely not impossible. More time, a little more lube.

So I begin with some traditional schoolboy style masturbation that I learned all by myself at age 12 in an effort to start building a hard-on, using a mix of lube and water. My penis is now quite damp with the mix of lube and water. Time to put the estim rings on. This is electrotherapy for the nerves controlling erection. The device runs on two AAA batteries, so it is way below any current level that might be harmful. The interesting part is that the estim rings mimic a lot of what normally happens brain to penis in sexual arousal and erection. I have learned something really interesting in doing this. The difference between the estim setting that is arousing and very pleasant and the setting that is mildly uncomfortable is very small, and the best results are obtained by finding a setting that is right on the edge between the two. WOW! That is it. I found it! The waves of current come in repetitive cycles. I can quickly sense when the next real jolt is going to happen then scream out in anticipatory pleasure that is just on the edge of a bit of pain. Over and over. Again and again. Vaguely self-SM. Soon, my whole body is shaking as my erection slowly builds some more with the next series of shocks. I am glad I live alone so I do do not have tp explain my screams of estim-induced pleasure. I am having so much sheer fun that I am on the edge of going into an orgasm. But then just before that happens I suddenly stop.

(To be continued)