What to wear?

[sebbie]

Whatever Dylan’s complaints about getting off sooner than he had hoped when trying on the suits in sequence, Dylan knows for sure that this has been maybe the most fun episodes he has ever had as a college student when enjoying his own body. Some orgasms are good, some are very good, and some are well, mind-blowing, and Dylan knows that this one clearly needs to be placed in “category 3” as in orgasms that are so profound that they only rarely happen.

What made the experience so profound, anyway? Well think of the lengthy sequence of events that led up to all of this..thinking up the idea in the first place, picking out and ordering the suits while staying within the often limited budget of a college freshman student, waiting for the order to arrive, opening the package, unwrapping each suit, feeling the material and studying the sizing, cut and color, and then finally getting to the point where the suits are tried on in size sequence from largest to smallest.

This really goes back to the old idea of a young guy wanting to buy his first swim brief and then take it to his room, close the door and immediately pull it on and jerk off in it. This likely happens a lot, and guys frequently agonize over being in a situation where they are wearing a swim brief in public and somehow can’t keep from shooting with lots of people around, male and (holy terror) female being able to see exactly what is happening. These thoughts probably deter a lot of guys from ever buying a swim brief even though they might deep down long for the opportunity to jerk off in one in private with no one else knowing that is what the real motive was all about. The related issue is that if a guy thinks of himself as otherwise perfectly straight, if the other guys ever figure out what he was doing he might very well be teased and bullied about being a closeted gay-boy, and it doesn’t help that in the minds of a lot of guys, a swim brief is something only a gay boy or perhaps a competitive swimmer or diver would ever wear. So what is this guy who is not even a good swimmer doing wearing one unless he is a gay boy who has not yet come out to others as such?

The seeming near anger many females express about the whole idea of a guy wearing a swim brief doesn’t help the situation either. Guys are usually quite OK with women being scantily clad, but apparently, many if not most women are less than OK with that as applied to guys , or so it seems at least. What rules apply here anyway, in a world where the guy is trying to build social bonds and relationships with others his age? The idea of being seen in public in a swim brief is simply “over the top” in a period in one’s life that is socially difficult with others the guy’s age or similar, both male and female.

All of this is really complicated stuff. Guys seem to learn at a very young age that the only sexual experience that matters is sex that happens when two willing partners bring their bodies together and exchange bodily fluids. At least that is how it is taught in a lot of sex education classes. Enjoying one’s own body is really all about finding a partner who willingly wants to do likewise. Everything has progressed now to the point where the notion of the partners being of the same sex or a of different sexes is at least acceptable in the mainstream, but where does that leave what has just happened to Dylan.

In fact, if Dylan were to appear in a book dealing with understanding sexuality how would his situation be characterized anyway? Some of the so-called experts might categorize Dylan as someone with an illness or abnormality best described as a fetish for snug-fitting swim briefs if he enjoys trying on and getting off in them. And that taken alone is abnormal.

Another group of sex experts might characterize Dylan as being not abnormal so much as being social and psychologically immature, and it’s about time for him to grow up and form bonds with someone else who will, under the best of circumstances, be his sexual partner, and then he can exchange bodily fluids with her (him?) hopefully for the rest of his life. For the moment, however, Dylan is more-or-less stuck in the activities that he liked as a younger teen, when the opportunities for forming significant bonds with others his age were fewer and, sexually at least, inappropriate. In short, Dylan may have a problem but it mainly to do with not yet being grown up enough to have fully appreciated why it’s important to get close enough to another person so that a real sexual relationship can occur between two people.

Wait a second here. If what just happened to Dylan is abnormal, immature or otherwise somehow bad, it is difficult to see exactly what is wrong with all of that. If this is somehow not right for a guy to do how come it was so much sheer fun? Is it somehow wrong for a guy to simply enjoy his own body to the fullest without being involved directly with a sexual partner? And what if a skimpy swim brief simply “helps” this all along? And, given that no bodily fluids were exchanged the risks in that department were essentially zero. Is this up to Dylan to determine whether what just happened is OK or not, or have the so-called sex experts simply not figured out the obvious yet?

Think about that. Taking on a sexual partner for life can be fun, but it can also be an enormous burden in a host of different ways. What are the tradeoffs here, anyway? Dylan can enjoy himself on his own in a special way with no strings attached, or he can enjoy himself with a sexual partner directly in what the experts would call a mature sexual relationship with all sorts of strings, asterisks and footnotes. Which of the two makes more sense? For a guy Dylan’s age, is this really any question at all?

Oh, and what of Josh in this situation? This may be even more complicated than it is for Dylan. As a younger teen, many guys are terrorized by the thought of their peers seeing them masturbate, and the so-called fear of discovery looms large in how a guy goes about coping with powerful urges that keep occurring practically on a daily basis. A general statement is that nearly every guy loves to jerk off at that age, but at the same time terrified about the prospect of being discovered doing so. The first level of terror is when the guy’s parents find out. But most guys (and most parents) work their way through that one. The second level of terror is the siblings, but mainly the younger siblings and especially the siblings who have not yet gone through puberty.

This chapter continues in the next post....