#1
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Speedos and self esteem
Hi all. I'm a 35 year old gay male, and I wanted to introduce myself. I am so excited to find this forum. I've always been lean but had very significant body image issues. I've also long since had a speedo and lycra thing, and sadly, being body shy and wearing speedos has never worked together. Last year, I began running, and after a few months, braved wearing tights. Slippery slope, I finally mustered the courage to actually buy a few square-cut speedo-style bathing suites. The bigger area needed was actually putting them on, in public. My first attempt was on a beach in Florida. I saw down, quickly pulled over my shorts I had over top, and never left the beach chair until I was ready to leave. I even slouched down so I wouldn't be seen. Since then, I've gotten brave, and finally wear these when at the beach with friends or on vacation. I don't think I'd have the courage to wear them when out with family, or anywhere where there may be loads of kids, but I'm loving it. My body image issues have actually gotten a lot better since starting to wear them. I feel more confident, and overall this has had a huge impact on my life. I'm still wondering if I'll be brave enough to wear more traditional speedo styles, but this was a huge step. I'm so glad to find a forum of people who "get" this, and can't wait to start to get introduced to the community.
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#2
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The key
i think the key to all of this is to purchase the suit you have always wanted to but were scared to wear because you thought it was skimpy or you don't know what others will say. A brief suit makes a good liner worn under bigger shorts. Wear the brief as a liner, maybe several times. Soon you will become comfortable with the fit and feel as being absolutely normal under your shorts. Then just slip off the bigger pair of shorts revealing your skimpier suit, assuming you are at a place and in company you feel comfortable doing that. This becomes something of a 'training program' that could take weeks or months, but soon you will be wearing briefs without even giving it a second thought!
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#3
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I agree with Sebbie, buy some speedos and wear them under your shorts while running or heading for the beach. Get used to having them on and around you. Wear them in the shower at home, after your run, you speedos are supposed to get wet ad you may enjoy them wet tightly clinging around you.
Start running in the shortest shorts you are comfortable with (your speedos hidden underneath of course), then when those shorts feel almost normal buy some an inch shorter and get used to those. Why stop at one pair of speedos, start a collection, your first pair will probably be black with 3" sides, but how about 2" sides or even a 1" side bikini. Then there are other solid colours and printed patterns to explore. You say that you have always been lean, perhaps you are even skinny, your PE teachers looking for muscular explosive sprinters for their football teams may have been sarcastic about your efforts, the school bullies would have picked up on this and reinforced the message breaking down your body confidence. On reaching puberty you may have had to hide your developing sexuality from those that were already abusive about your body. Slim young men are beautiful but often need someone to tell them so after all the bullying and jeering they go through at school. Wear you speedos with pride, Tom Daly did and he won the World Championships and got an Olympic bronze despite bullying at school. |
#4
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The only problem is being worried about what other people think. If you don't worry about it, you'll be surprised at how far you can go.
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